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You know you live in Silicon Valley when: >>You make $120,000 a year, but can't find a place to live. --- >> >>Your commute time is 45 minutes and you live 8 miles from work. >> >>You stop asking how much things cost and start asking "How long will it >>take?" >> >>Two-thirds of the people you know are from Boston, Austin, Raleigh-Durham >>or New York, but you are living in PST. >> >>You know vast and subtle differences between Thai, Vietnamese, Chinese, >>Japanese, Cantonese, and Korean food. >> >>Your home computer contains mostly hardware/software that isn't on the >>consumer market yet. >> >>You go to "The City" on weekends but don't live there because you like your >>car. >> >>You think that "I'm going to Fry's Electronics" is an acceptable excuse to >>leave the office for a while. And your boss does too. >> >>You /lost/never had/don't know how to set/ the alarm clock. >> >>You'll just get to work when you get there. >> >>You go to an industrial-heavy-metal bar and see two guys get into a fight >>over what flavor of UNIX is better. >> >>You own more than 10 articles of clothing that have hardware and/or >>software companies printed on them. (Bonus for embroidered stuff.) >> >>You know where Woz Way, Resistor Ave., and Floppy Drive are located. >> >>You know where Woz is. >> >>You know Hwy 280 North runs west, and Hwy 680 North runs East. >> >>Even though Microsoft employs quite a few programmers in the Bay Area, they >>only work on Powerpoint, and the company is still the embodiment of Satan. >>(Even if their stock IS worth more than yours.) >> >>You see a billboard that says "FGPA2ASIC" and aren't fazed. >> >>When you need the updated Diamond Monster 3D drivers, you just walk across >>the street. >> >>You have more bandwidth in your apartment or condo than most major >>universities. >> >>You have to hire security to keep the panhandlers off your terrace. >>(Oakland/Berkeley). >> >>None of the people you work with are bible thumpers. >> >>You scan yard sales for back issues of "Dr. Dobbs." >> >>Your favorite computer reseller speaks only Cantonese. >> >>Your workplace vending machines dispense "100% natural twig-bars" right >>next to Jolt cola and Instant Espresso mix. >> >>No one brings radios into work - they just use RealAudio and listen to >>thedj.com, rebelradio.com, or other out-of-state stations. >> >>You don't understand how the carpool lanes work because you normally don't >>commute during those hours. >> >>You meet a friend for lunch and the first topic is where they are working >>now. >> >>You go to the movies and EVERYBODY claps along with the SciFi theme music. >> >>You entice prospective employees to join your company by bragging about the >>speed of your internet connection. >> >>You've replaced your box of floppies with a box of Zip disks, but that's >>just until you get your box of Jaz disks. >> >>You have completely forgotten how to write longhand. >> >>You know it's Christmas Day because the parking lots at the electronics >>companies are only half full. >> >>You have to think twice before you realize that "beta blocker" is a medical >>term, not some new exotic software. >> >>You think Steve Jobs is a "hunk." >> >>You have no idea your apartment/house is really dirty because you haven't >>seen it during daylight hours in over two years. >>If it weren't for Trader Joe's frozen meals, you'd starve to death. >> >>You really meant to change the oil in your car 50,000 miles ago. >> >>You suddenly realize that the face of the person you live with-usually a >>husband or wife-looks really familiar, but several years older. >> >>Your kids grew up and went to college but you're palm-top still has a >>standing notation to drop by Toys ' R' Us to pick up a dozen packs of >>disposable diapers, but they're always closed when you finally get there. >>(Your kids potty-trained themselves.) >> >>You know the name of the manager of every Starbuck's in a hundred-mile >>radius. >> >>You know that "PARC" isn't some place to walk your dog. >> >>Your dog died of inattention. >> >>So did your cat. >> >>You spend more time checking the value of your stock options than you do at >>the gym, but you're still paying $25 monthly for a membership to a place >>you haven't visited in 18 months. >> >>You're on a first-name basis with the local Pizza Hut franchise owner. >> >>Sex? That sounds familiar. Is it a new video game?
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